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Couples and Families

Sanctuary members regularly contribute to this blog with information of interest to Carers of people with BPD.
To join our e-mailing list, come along to a Sanctuary meeting or contact us here

September 2019 Mens Group Meeting – Coffee Chat

The September meeting of the Sanctuary’s Mens Group was a great success!

The next meeting is Sunday 6th October, at 12:30-2:30pm at Cafe Outside the Square, 34 Whitmore Square, Adelaide (near corner of Sturt Street).

New members are welcome.

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On Loneliness

Professor Sharon Lawn shares her very personal experience caring for her husband who has significant mental illness and psychosocial disability. 

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When you can never be enough

Dr Margaret Rutherford talks about the exhaustion and guilt that can be felt by someone who’s trying to love a person with BPD. She offer nine strategies to try to ease the guilt

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Please Listen – a poem

When I ask that you listen to me, and you give advice, you have not heard what I ask of you When I ask that you listen to me, and you tell me why I shouldn’t feel as I do, you are trampling on my feelings When I ask you to listen to me, and you feel you have to find...

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Children who have a Parent with Mental Illness

Some members support a child or grandchild whose parent has been diagnosed with, or has symptoms of BPD.
I know this causes more distress for you as you try to give the best care to the little one (or sometimes not so little!!)

Here are links to some information that may help you in your care for childen or grandchildren.

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Christmas Wishes 2018

Dear Sanctuary members. My granddaughters tell me it is only three more sleeps till Christmas morning so it is definitely time I wrote to you all with my Christmas thoughts and wishes. I must admit I have been struggling with how to wish you...

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Self-harm and BPD, from Gunderson and Hoffman Publication

Suicidal and Self-Injurious Behaviour in Borderline Personality Disorder Barbara Stanley, Ph.D. Beth S. Brodsky, Ph.D.   Deliberately inflicted self-harm in the context of borderline personality disorder (BPD) can be disturbing, frightening, and shame provoking to...

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Thoughts for Carers, by Robert Trett

Thoughts for Carers from Robert Trett, of Spectrum Personality Disorder Service, Victoria Criticism turns off hearing Threats fall on deaf ears Love and encouragement offer the strongest hope We cling to the belief that if we prop someone up for long enough, he or she...

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Siblings and Mental Illness – Fact Sheet

One of our members asked for info to help siblings who live with a brother or sister diagnosed with a mental illness and when I read this Fact Sheet, Siblings and Mental Health, from Centacare and Siblings Australia, I thought others might find it useful as well.

Share it with any siblings who are struggling with their brother or sister.

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Validation Vs Tough Love

At times, carers of people living with BPD have asked me if tough love is what they should be doing to help the person they care for, to make them "grow up", or to give them ultimatums if they don't change their behaviours. I have always answered that...

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Christmas Thoughts 2016

Hi Everyone, Bob and I struggled with our Christmas message to you all, trying to find the right words to let you know we were thinking of you all at this time of the year, and most of all to help those of you who are apprehensive about Christmas to...

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Main Subjects:  Caring for Someone with BPD,  Events,  Getting Help,  Living with BPD,  Research,  BPD in the Media

Other Subjects:  Advocacy, BPD Awareness Week, Couples and Families, National BPD Conference, Sanctuary Meetings, Treatment, Validation, What is BPD

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This website is produced by members of the Sanctuary Support Group. We are not mental health professionals nor clinicians.  We are ordinary people who care for someone with BPD. This website is a collection of information that we have found helpful or of interest in the context of our own lived experiences. The content of this website is not a substitute for independent professional advice, diagnosis or treatment.