accurate expression: when we think, feel or want something and we describe it accurately
advance care directive: a legal form for people aged over 18 years to record wishes and instructions for their future health care if unable to make their own decisions.
affective: pertaining to one’s emotional state.
affect regulation: controlling one’s emotions.
Axis I: a classification in DSM-IV-TR (American Psychiatric Association 2000) consisting of major psychiatric disorders, including mood disorders (depression and bipolar disorder), anxiety disorders, eating disorders, schizophrenia, etc.
Axis II: a classification in DSM-IV-TR for personality disorders, for example, BPD.

BPD: Borderline Personality Disorder, see About BPD

carer: someone who provides, or has provided personal care, support, advocacy or assistance to a person living with borderline personality disorder.
a thought or belief.
cognitive: referring to thinking or reasoning.
comorbid: occurring together with another disease or condition.
consumer: someone with lived experience of borderline personality disorder (irrespective of a formal diagnosis), and have accessed services or received treatment.
COVID restrictions: during the global pandemic of 2020, Australian governments put restrictions on social gatherings to slow the spread of coronavirus. Sanctuary meetings were held on-line to comply with those restrictions.

depersonalization: a sense of being unreal.
diagnostic criteria: a list of clinical features that must be present for the diagnosis of a mental disorder to be made.
dialectical behavior therapy (DBT): a treatment for BPD developed by Marsha Linehan combining aspects of cognitive and behavioral therapy. The treatment teaches specific skills to manage emotions, control impulsiveness, and diminish self-destructive behavior.
feelings of detachment from one’s own body or thinking.
DSM: Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders; the American system of classification of psychiatric diagnoses.
DVD: a recording, commonly a film or an audio recording, stored on a DVD disc.  Sanctuary has a library of DVDs which members may access.
dysphoria: a state of sadness or depressed mood.
dysregulation: the inability to regulate or control (mood or impulses).

ED: Emergency Department of a hospital
email: electronic mail: a message sent between people using computer software.  
emotion (primary):  
fear, happiness/love, embarrassment/shame, guilt and sadness
emotion (secondary): a reaction to a primary emotion
etiology: cause or presumed cause.

hypervigilance: When someone is on alert for a threat, but more than they need to.

ideation: the process of thinking or forming ideas.
impulsivity: inability to resist performing some action.
invalidation: When you communicate that another person’s experience, emotions, thinking or actions are invalid or wrong or bad, and they shouldn’t feel that way.   Even when it is valid.

judgements: Judgements help us sort our emotions into good/bad, right/wrong or should/shouldn’t.  Judgements are associated with secondary emotion and can lead to a lot of pain

mentalisation-based therapy (MBT): a type of psychotherapy for BPD (developed by Peter Fonagy and Anthony Bateman) that focuses on the ability to recognize thoughts, feelings, wishes, and desires to see how they are linked to behavior. 
Paying attention on purpose, right here and now, with no interpretations or judgements

non-judgemental stance: To enter into a reality that is real and solid.    (a judgement is not reality, it’s an interpretation)   It is primarily about description

pathology: the condition and processes of a disease or disorder.
psychosis: a loss of reality and impairment of mental, social, and personal functioning.

radical acceptance: when you accept reality eg it is what it is.  Letting go of the illusion of control and accepting things as they are right now, without judging
what one person does affects the other and what they do comes back and affects the one.
reciprocity (negative): when one person is judgemental, then over time, the other may become more judgemental
reciprocity (positive): as one person becomes more aware, present, caring and gentle, it becomes easier for the other person to be warm and loving
relationship mindfulness: 
bringing all of your attention to another person right now in this moment, with interest, observation and description (not being judgemental or critical)

schema-focussed therapy: a type of psychotherapy for BPD  (developed by Dr. Jeff Young) that focuses on identifying and changing specific unhealthy ways of thinking. 
suicidal ideation:
thoughts of wishing one were not alive or of committing suicide.

trigger: an external event or circumstance that may produce very uncomfortable emotional or psychiatric symptoms, such as anxiety, panic, discouragement, despair, or negative self-talk

validation: legitimizing the emotions, thoughts, and experiences of another.  Communicating the legitimacy of the other persons experience, emotion, thought, want or activity.   A validating response is that makes sense.   Praise means you like it but validation means you understand it and it is legitimate

See also Resources

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Main Subjects:  Caring for Someone with BPD,  Events,  Getting Help,  Living with BPD,  Research,  BPD in the Media

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This website is produced by members of the Sanctuary Support Group. We are not mental health professionals nor clinicians.  We are ordinary people who care for someone with BPD. This website is a collection of information that we have found helpful or of interest in the context of our own lived experiences. The content of this website is not a substitute for independent professional advice, diagnosis or treatment.

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